Why everyone hating on the SnapChat doggy filter?

What I'm actually doing when I say I'm busy working... 

Transferring info from my old laptop to my new one and I found photos and videos of past relationships… Is it weird that I have no desire to hold on to them?

I’m never going to go back and look at them… I prefer to look forward.

I understand why people keep memories… I just feel like someone much more compatible and perfect for me is out there and I have to make room for all the new memories. Is it weird that I can already feel it?


No rush.

I got time.

I got love and only love,



My kids ask why I make stupid faces when I dance… and I had to explain to them, that we must let out all the funk, otherwise you’re not really dancing. They are now practicing their funky faces, even during their dance classes lol

I was Danny at one point in my life.

Updating my phone and seeing all my photos and videos of the past year, and wow. Like legit, why did I enjoy taking so many pictures of myself? lol it’s kind of embarrassing… If I could travel back in time to punch myself in the face for some of the things I’ve done, I would.

10 days notice. 14 rented dresses. Model friend last min request. Family photographer. 13 hr red eye flight night before. 72 hrs hustle. 0 sleep.

My first photoshoot ever. I’m wanting to do more of this.

I love love love making people happy… I have this need to serve and go above and beyond. I want to give my best… my all. Or I don’t want to lift a finger at all.

When people ask are you an introvert or an extrovert? Why is it “or” instead of “and”? Why can’t we be EVERYTHING? That’s why I don’t entertain the idea of the Myers Briggs test… my ex husband was big on it, and when he asked me to take it multiple times, I show up extremely both… I believe it’s to test people who have been through the school/work systems, not outliers who self educate.

So crazy… I haven’t talk to him in months, I just unblocked him and started thinking about him and BOOM, he messages me right away… how crazy is that? Legit, I believe I’m getting better with my intentions.

It’s nice to have people who understand my weirdness… I will just disappear for a while to work on a solution to whatever it is I’m trying to solve. I block to avoid temptation. I know that’s not normal… but who’s trying to be?

My conversations with myself are so weird… lol I can’t imagine anyone else able to tolerate such silliness.

Filled with candies, toys and words of encouragements in reusable acorn capsules… this mini vending machine encourages my kids to figure out ways to earn quarters.

It’s probably one of the funniest things for my mom and I to watch… they get so excited and want to put all the candies from our pantry in the capsules… then they want to work for the quarters just to get the candies they could’ve gotten easily for free from the pantry.

Becoming a single parent was one of the biggest blessings for our family. I’m holding the bar super high, I think I’m going to be single for the rest of my life.

I’m learning to become the best mom I can be for my kids.

Since I no longer have nannies… and their father is becoming increasingly busier with his success, plus he lives over 4K miles away… it’s just my mom, the kids and I… pretty much 90% of the time.

We’ve been bonding and growing in ways that was never allowed to before.

I’m a much better daughter. My mom deserves the world.

I didn’t realize what I was missing before. I thought I had it all before… now I have even more.

God does work in mysterious ways.

I trust. I truly, truly trust.

With love and only love.



My 80 year old mom and my kids are my everything. Seriously. EVERYFUCKINGTHING.

Giant Trevally swim in patterns and we have no idea why… it’s so cool and crazy that we can’t understand nature fully, yet we seem to think we know enough about it to make decisions that harms her.

Here’s a theory… what if they swim like that because they’re sending signals to something reading their patterns?

It’s not that crazy to believe… animals have internal receivers/transmitters that send/receive signals from nature.

There’s a reason to nature… just because we don’t understand it, doesn’t mean there’s a lack of reasons.

My cycle came earlier than expected… it was just crazy how it synced up with the moon.

This was a blood red lunar eclipse full moon.

How fucking awesome is God?

How dare we use FUCK and GOD in the same sentence. But if we say “we fucking love God”, would it be okay?

I let my kids use profanity but they’re not allowed to curse. The difference is, “Oh fuck” and “Fuck You”.

The stone age way of believing in the Lord is over. FUCK is a manmade word with man made definitions and man made applications.

Even man made reactions? You chose how you react to it. Stop dictating how & if people should use it. Telling kids they should cut off their wieners is a lot more harmful than hearing and saying the word fuck.

How are you going to tell me God would be upset at me saying Fuck? Did God tell you that?

We vilify things we don’t understand.

Instead of saying we just don’t know much, or anything about it… we vilify it… we vilify people we don’t know, just because we “heard” or think some things about them.

Why are we so quick to be “PROS” on any given subject, or about anyone, without much knowledge about it/them?

I hand my phone to a couple checking out pics of my kids… didn’t realize how far they flipped through, when I noticed that he’s gone far enough for them to see my nude selfies… this was about 20ish images in, not sure how they got there so fast.

She got completely embarrassed and apologized… and I just jokingly said “it’s no big deal, at least you didn’t get to the videos” lol

She, while somewhat appalled, warned me that I shouldn’t record things I don’t want people to see… they will last forever.

I told her I don’t mind people seeing it, just the people sitting right next to me at the very moment and while we’re on the subject of kids… plus, I just met them.

I don’t have a shy bone in my body… and have no problem with people seeing me. BUT, there’s a place and time for it…

A lot of “vanilla” people have problems with other people’s sexual self expression.

I don’t get it… As long as no one is harmed, emotionally, spiritually or physically… who are we to decide what sparks their joy?

In pretty much every other culture, sexual appreciation is expressed in our music and dance, even in our worship… it’s considered beautiful and for a lot of us, an art to be perfected and explored with someone you care about.

Why would you vilify some thing that’s the path to the highest form of creative energy?

I believe because of this, more assaults happen… men aren’t taught to understand their bodies and emotions, so they risk life and liberty to engage in it.

While women are taught to be ashamed of it. Why?

Statues of Apsara on the facade of Angkor Wat Temple, Siem Reap, Cambodia // 1113

Look at the difference.

Statues of saints on the facade of the Cathedral of Our Lady, Antwerp, Belgium // 1521

Sex is a very important subject… and the fact that we continue to make it taboo will be the reason why sexual crimes continue to occur. We need to educate on not just the physical but the mental/spiritual side to fully understand it… that’s when it crosses the line and starts sounding religious. But have you read the book of Psalms or the Song of Solomon?

It’s so important to understand, yet it’s so taboo.

Society continues to shame us for even thinking about it.

Early on in my previous relationship, his former “love of his life” approached me alone in hopes of jeopardizing our union.

She informs me, “He’s a pervert, he likes to choke you during sex”… and I respond confusingly “… you don’t like that?”

I was honest to God shocked that she would try to kink shame something as innocent as that.

Why do we do this to each other? What value does that bring to your life?

Why is it in society, when a woman is confident in her sexuality, she is seen as a “whore”?

They don’t want women to have the power.

I believe when women are in power… kids will be prioritized, and therefore the future saved.

The world would finally be at peace.

Until then… we have a lot to do.

And it all starts with love and only love,



Where ever I bring my kids, they seem to attract attention. They LOVE it. They love interacting with people… and our lovely waitress saw that they were sharing their meals… my son says to her “we share because we’re a loving family.”… lol she just had all types of reasons to want more kids.

Trust me… spending time with my kids, will make you want more kids. Shit, I feel bad for those who can’t have kids… legit, that’s the worst feeling ever, now I know what they’re actually missing out on. The connection is powerful.

My kids are begging me to grow out my hair in hopes of attracting a mate lol, they really dislike it, but I’m actually playing a game with myself.

Betting myself to shave my head IF I lie to myself ever again.

Every strand on my head will be the product of truth. Whether it’s harsh or not lol… it’ll be my truth. And if I lie to myself, I will shave my head again. I didn’t realize how much hair I had though… I didn’t realize how much we lie to ourself either.

I told the kids that we don’t need a male figure in our life, we just need an assistant! And so the search is on.

I think privilege is when you FORCE your beliefs onto others and vilify those who don’t agree. Like the church and some government.

I’m not racist… I’m only applying this to extreme white liberals.

Extreme white liberals are just as dangerous as extreme conservatives. Balance is what we should want to achieve, knowing that you can’t be 100% happy to be truly happy, lol not sure if that makes sense.

Like Yin and Yang idea. The dark side always exist, you must learn to live with it, by achieving balance.

You can kick the devil out your house, and still send him some love on his way.

I think these types of people are dangerous for our children. They label our children instead of allowing them to discover themselves.

There should really be a test to procreate… The future CAN NOT be this… it is harmful to encourage self body hatred and mutilation… it’s about teaching understanding and self love.

I just can’t believe common sense is really NOT common. No wonder wars in the world still happen.

I realize that people spend more time wishing for someone’s downfall than working on their prosperity.

We have a hard time wanting good for others because we don’t believe we deserve good for ourself.

I know it sounds OVER EXAGGERATING… but because of this belief, wars, genocides, slavery and all things bad continue.

The answer for world peace with prosperity for all is right in front of our faces… I believe in the future.

Homemade laundry detergent

Just got to get rid of the junk and get back to nature. Back to reality. Back to God.

Back to love and only love,



We are funny creatures. We project.

I respect your opinion… I just don’t care.

I caught an uber the other day, and the nice young lady and I had a conversation about religion during our drive. I enjoy passionate conversations instead of where can I grab a bite or the weather bs… She’s gay, and asked me what are my thoughts on homosexuals.

Seeing crosses and verses all over my body, she assumed I was always a hardcore God believer. I informed her that I never denounced God, but I neglected him… and just found him again a little over a year ago… Finding God was one of the reasons for my divorce. Gladly so.

I told her to take into consideration at what time period the bible was written and which verses are we referring to.

I believe the bible contains information that were just for your INFORMATION. That is it. It’s not God’s word… it’s information about what’s going on during that time. Like a recount of what the laws of the land were etc.

So there are “verses” of the bible that relate to homosexuality being a sin. My belief is that back in the day science and religion were intermixed, there’s no separation. In fact, check out Alchemy! That’s when I learned more about I Ching… but that’s another story.

But because science and religion were “combined”, the information in the bible is either another scientific way of saying if you’re gay, you can’t have kids… your bloodline is done. The End.

And some of the verses shows what was the law of the land at the time. Immoral sex I believe referred to pedophiles and other harmful sexual desires NOT homosexuals… hence the reason why they had to separate homosexual regulation from just that of immoral sex.

I believe that straight sex was encouraged because they want the people to HAVE MORE CHILDREN.


More money… more work force… more military etc… more more more. Shit, Americans are complaining about not having enough children right now, and it’s because they are too greedy to spread the wealth that we can’t afford to have a lot of children. Imagine if we had universal healthcare that’s actually good? And great free education? Shit, I would have a billion kids.

I let her know my truth.

I was at the bank yesterday, and had an intense almost hour long conversation about China with a very nice Chinese woman. She explains to me that her government is fine and that the complaints that I hear about… well “there’s two sides to every story”.

I tried to make a comparison to white people here in the usa… they have no idea about what racism truly is and how it affects us everyday. Some do, but the majority don’t… that’s why the USA government are able to get away with what they are doing to poor and black people.

Realize that wasn’t going to convince her to understand my concerns. She says they’re not harvesting organs, and I explained to her that their gov stated that they are harvesting LESS organs now than they did previously. That’s when she justified it saying it’s organs from prisoners on death row who volunteer their organs.

I then inquire about what types of crimes are punishable in china? Would you say they have the same freedom to use their mind for anything they want without punishment? Meaning to believe what they want to believe, as long as no one is harmed? Do they have that freedom? To bring your thoughts to life? Your creative energy… your God energy.


She informed me that those are people the gov are not taking care of, and they’re not really part of the people.

I know she is one who understand the plight of black people here in America. So I am incredibly baffled.

So I have to approach the mom in her… I asked if a child told her that s/he was assaulted by an adult, would you believe the child or are you one of those who say “Well, let’s hear what the adult have to say first before we believe the child”.

I can understand the logic in that… but there’s a fucking red flag that needs immediate attention asap and waiting to hear the other side is NOT the next step in the matter. Securing the child and making sure s/he is safe and protected is priority before hearing the other side of the story.

That’s when it made sense to her. It clicked. You see it in her eyes and her whole soul just lifted a little bit lighter with more understanding.

We transition into discussing trans people, she has a child discovering herself.

We talked about the young boy who transition into a girl… OMG. LET ME TELL YOU. I’m all for gay rights and love all people of all background. BUT Children are meant to explore and discover themselves. NOT to be told they are trans and therefore they should be put on hormone therapy in preparation to mutilate their bodies later on in life.

I had a friend who’s daughter became trans after a trauma involving watching her mother being attacked by her stepdad and she attempted to help, and instead she was also hurt.

There’s a documentary following a transgender boy who’s parents adopted a little girl when he was about 4 or 5… he once was the center of attention, and it all changed and the new girl had all the attention. She got all these cute dresses etc. The little boy wanted the same. The mom cried and said “ahhhh my child is trans!”… they went and saw a “therapist” who recommended the child start hormone therapy to prepare his body to have a vagina later on in life.

There was one vital split second part where the kid says to his mother, “Mom, I don’t think I want to be a girl anymore”… and the mother’s reaction was to burst into tears and started crying. It was about HER. NOT HER CHILD. It’s a form of munchausen by proxy.

The boy changed his mind to please his mother.

THIS IS ON A PUBLIC DOCUMENTARY. This is child abuse. The therapist, the doctors and the parents should all be arrested and sterilized. HONESTLY. This is what’s just been recorded… imagine what goes on behind closed doors? Those are some fucked up parents who fake the funk of being concerned and all for progressive liberal rights.


They are meant to explore and discover themselves. I thought I was a boy for a few years growing up… I was the dark skin girl in the family who had bushy eyebrows… like both my brothers… I really thought I was a boy… and I’m glad my parents didn’t decide to put me on some penis growing pills.

My ten year old asked me what do I think about gay people in front of his brother and sister… and their big brown eyes looking at me for guidance… I told them that gay people are like super heroes… it’s not normal, but it’s not wrong.

Having said that… I’ve been spending my toilet time arguing with middle class white women who are actually passionate about their beliefs, but completely oblivious to any perspective les’ it’s of middle class whites. You can tell these people, the entitled… victims… they’re people who want to be discriminated against so they have a reason to be passionate about something.

And if you don’t agree with them, you’re the enemy… they’re extremists. They are the ones telling me that I HAVE to call trans-women, women… but I’m going to call them trans-women to differentiate. I feel that it’s gender appropriating and it’s really shitty of them to do that to us… something that makes us unique. Somethings just can’t be bought.

I don’t believe you can buy gender.

I don’t believe you can buy culture.

You definitely can’t buy love.

I do believe everyone should be treated with great love and equality… but that doesn’t mean I’m stupid enough to believe we are all the same.

We are equal… but we are not the same.

And these extremists don’t understand.

They get offended. They get mad… and they attack like dogs with rabies.

I wish I was exaggerating.

A woman believes that being diagnosed as bi-polar is a mental illness… people like that saddens me greatly. They are just willing to eat up the pills being fed to them. They become victims and are OVERLY sensitive. What if I told you that being bi-polar, like having ADD is NOT a mental illness but instead a GIFT?

YES… a gift. The ability to have both negative and positive charges to the extreme? That’s what gives you passion and drive. Your only problem is you don’t know how to direct it, so you ask the government to supply you with drug dealers to prescribe you with pills to continue to control you… because you can’t control yourself.

ADD is another gift… the ability to daydream while they’re trying to spoon feed you their bullshit? lol but seriously, I believe the solution for people with ADD is to have multiple input going on around them for proper focus.

I notice that I’m able to pick up and learn new things quicker, if I have music playing on my speaker, audiobook playing on my Alexa, my TV is playing documentaries, and my iPad is playing music videos… all this while I work, or try to learn something new. THIS is the best way for me to learn… and I notice it works with my son also.

Don’t expect everyone to learn the way you do… what works for you might not work for all, but it might be of benefit to someone, so why not share it? Share your secrets. Good secrets are meant to be shared.

God’s secrets are everywhere.

Look and see.

With love and only love,



Found a mobility scooter for cheap on the way home… was fun to take it around the neighborhood with the kids. I want to pimp it out lol

It’s nice to receive messages from my ex husband like this… I must be doing something right 🙂

It’s been a little over a year since we split, after a decade together.

He sees our kids about 10 weeks out of the year, so it is imperative that we maintain a good relationship for the sake of the kids… and mature adult communication is the key.

So weird to close this chapter of my life… it was a great learning experience.

I wish nothing but the best for him.

With love and only love.



And ye shall receive.

Got exactly what I asked for from 2018 🤷🏾‍♀️

2019, I love you! 😘


Mele Kalikimaka

I would wish Jesus a Happy Bornday, but we all know he wasn’t born in winter.

The winter solstice is worth celebrating though. Especially here in Hawai’i.

I was actually shocked to learn the history of Christmas, so I thought I would share it.

Makes you wonder how anyone would claim that it’s a Christian holiday.

History of Christmas 🎄

Merry Christmas.



I have scars, stretch marks, no hair, no lashes, no make up, no style, no care in the world… yet I have never felt so much confidence.

I have something that means more than anything. I have purpose.

I am waiting for Jesus. But I do enjoy being with someone… to cuddle with. It’s nice to feel human once in a while lol

2 year bet on myself, with myself.

I want to see what I’m capable of.

I want to amaze myself.

With love and only love,



Imagine our 40 days and 40 nights is 400 years of flooding from melted ice caps?

Just saying… what if because we commit so much sin against nature, god finally gives us the big “fuck you” again?

What if because we are the disease of the earth & it’s mother’s way of putting us in time out?

And the ones who survive remembers never to disrespect her again?

You’d think we would learn and read the signs already… history has a way of repeating itself.

But of course the evil don’t believe in eternity so they will burn everything down for momentary “happiness”, they won’t be here to suffer the consequences of their actions… or would they?

I’m crazy…

The Bible says heaven is here on earth. If you believe.

What if eternity is in us all along and we just have to believe?

I know… sounds crazy huh?

But what if?

The emerald tablet? “As above, so below, as within, so without”…

Basically “on earth as it is here in heaven”…

Everything is connected. All religions and all beliefs. They separate them to depreciate the value of its teachings as a whole. Think about it.

What’s the harm in believing in possibilities?


I could see a modern, not so far off, scientific way of it happening… with all these transplants and genetic engineering… it’s only a matter of time when we can transplant a human brain into another body… then we’ll be manufacturing bodies for brains to purchase.

It’s really NOT that crazy. They make ears and hearts etc NOW.

They can make a human body without a brain and just have it ready for a transfer.

Yes yes, the future has so many possibilities of eternity being reachable.

What if Jesus figured it out and some others did too, and they’re just watching us in shame waiting for some of us to wake the fuck up before it’s too late?

Those guys walk on water… a flood isn’t going to affect them lol

All I’m saying is, don’t discount my theory just because it’s crazy… and it’s only crazy because it’s not popular opinion… or anyone else’s opinion lol 😝

Look, we have an amazing world… and we could make our lives even more amazing just by making our world more amazing and it’s by making our neighbors’ lives more amazing.

Do something for someone… even the smallest of things… not sure where I’m going with this, but I believe we aren’t completely hopeless, not all of us.

We can do more for each other… than we are doing now.

Everyone of us knows someone who need some help. Whether it’s words of encouragement or a ride to work.

Or if you’re anti social like I am lol, speak up for someone who can’t. Speak up for the homeless, animals, seniors, handicaps, anyone who need someone to feel they’re not alone… why not?

Speak up for the children… the kids. They need us more than anything. If you see something just not right, call it the fuck out and be willing to take the blows from devils… in the end, they don’t win. They can’t. And YOU know you did right and THAT is godly.

God is watching… and he is real.

With love and only love… aloha


You can tell a lot about a man by the way he treats his wife and kids… How all women and children are treated says a lot about a country.

So here’s a question, why isn’t there a universal teaching for children to understand right touch from wrong touch?

Why don’t public school teach children what is considered wrong touching? They could save so many children who have no idea they’re being assaulted. I believe every single mom/parent/guardian who love their child(dren) could agree that there’s such thing as WRONG TOUCHING… can’t we come up with a way to teach that to our kids, and teach our teachers to identify who need to be rescued?

They don’t do this!? Why? We all know why… but what are we going to do about it?

I came to America as a 3 year old refugee… to parents in their 40s and 50s who didn’t speak English. I was the 2nd youngest out of 7 kids… I was outgoing and cute… I was a prime target to be conditioned for sexual assault by men who were in positions of trust, mainly doctors… those fuckers are the worst.

Once when I was a teen, I was assaulted by a long time male friend, my best friend at the time was a lot more upset than I was… she wanted to get her dad to confront our “friend”… I told her it was no big deal because it didn’t hurt. I was used to being kissed and touched… I thought that was just normal behavior. It was the first time I experience someone being upset about me being assaulted, it was the first time I was told it was wrong and it was not okay.

As a child, when I told my mom about the kissing and touching, she told me to not wear shorts and tee shirt anymore. She wasn’t taught any better.

Now as a mom to 2 boys and a girl, I realized all the things that happened to me that I just brushed aside was NEVER okay…

I know I have to do better… I have to teach better and help them understand better.

Prepping myself for hard questions as they come up… I need to ensure my answers encourage my children to have open minds and open hearts, but be smart enough to protect themselves.

I use to question why I was highly sexed, always wondered why my mind was always in the gutter… I use to think maybe I’m really a dude trapped inside a little girl’s body lol… I just now realized I was conditioned for it.

I can joke about it now… kind of… no not really… I’m not as scarred by the past anymore… but trust me, it was NOT an easy climb up… lots of unexplained break downs and tears, destruction of relationships over the years.

I know for a fact I didn’t have it at all near as bad as some of the kids I knew growing up. My heart breaks for them… my heart breaks for all children.

So how do we prevent all this useless horrifying life threatening harm in the future? How the future turns out depends on how we treat our children… What we teach them. So how is there not a universal teaching already?!

We have to do better.

Theres a reason for our existence. There’s a reason why we know what we know… we should find out that reason.

It’s a peculiar thing for information to be kept from you, the public… but the most baffling thing is knowing there’s information out there, and having zero desire to find it. How are you happy with just existing?

Yet the worst offense ever is KNOWING the info and doing absolutely nothing about it.

What are you capable of? Definitely more than what you’re doing now, that’s for sure… what compels you?

That’s where we fall short as humans, we forget about humankind.

We tend to be selfish with our lives, living it for just our superficial self experience… when we realize we are part of something so much bigger, we start to care more about our actions… or lack there of.

What a difference half a decade can make.

Funny thing is, I found God through the bible teachings and connecting it with modern science.

Religious leaders will tell you NOT to believe in astrology and mock and make fun of other teachings… but yet won’t make the connection in the bible about those three wise men and the star of Bethlehem… those dudes use astrology to find Jesus… HELLO?! These idiots act as if they KNOW all the answers to the bible and the TRUE word of God.

There’s so much information they are distorting and keeping from us. A half truth is equivalent to a lie.

It’s like the government lying to us about marijuana… God’s magical medicine.

It’s for control. God is all things good. All things good means all possibilities without limitations. God is limitless.

Yes it’s a little scary to view God differently than what we are taught.

Truth can be scary… and sadly it’s never free. Someone will have to pay the price for it, but once it’s paid, it’s free for the rest of us.

Truth be told, I’m scared as fuck. Now that I KNOW God is real, I can’t go back to being oblivious and live selfishly. Ignorance is bliss? Maybe.

But I rather know for sure. Wouldn’t you? Am I really THAT weird? I can’t be the only one… seriously. lol

With love and only love,



I’ll dance to any music, from rap to reggae, country, hip hop, polka, just about anything. I love to dance… Am I any good? That’s debatable lol

But I still do it anyways.

I find myself enjoying being alone more and more. I don’t have any need to be with a partner… and it’s one of the most freeing feelings in the world, to depend on myself. To be with myself.

I’m focused.

Every step I take going forward will be all in the Lord’s name.

With God on my side, we will clean the world of this unholiness one soap box at a time lol I’m dead serious

God is real. The church is a fraud. So are religious “leaders”. They’re suppose to help guide you, not direct you.

That’s where they get confused with their power. We give it to them, and they abuse it, they abuse us. Stop giving them power.

Why are they worshipped? Fuck them. God before any church. God before any man. God before anything or anyone. As it should be.

Don’t let these religious frauds tell you you’re not worthy of God’s love if you don’t love God the way they tell you to.

Your relationship with God is private and it’s between you and God. Fuck the church.

Don’t let idiots tell you that you must attend their cult once a week in order to get your message to the lord. Fuck the church.

It’s time for a new start. God deserves better. And so do we.

With love and only love,



I’m never bored when I’m alone…

I enjoy meself way too much lol

With love, and only love…



We spend so much time trying to impress others, but hardly any time trying to impress ourselves.

This was my first year being single as an adult…  I’ve learned to work new muscles I didn’t know existed. At first it ached, and I was scared of the exercise. But now I’m beyond excited to see what comes of it.

I notice that as I get older (and wiser), I cycle through my emotions a lot quicker than I did when I was younger. I’m able to get up a lot quicker. Dust myself off and try again.

Impressing others is easy… most people are easily impressed. But impressing yourself? That shit is hard. Because only you know for sure if you tried your best. If you gave it your all or not… and if you’re honest with yourself, you’ll realize how hard it is to truly impress yourself, lol… at least for me anyways.

I do impress myself sometimes, when I work with my hands and create things that were in my mind quickly… I got blessed to grow up with my dad being a carpenter and my brothers binge watching This Old House.

Granted it’s not high quality wood work lol, but I’m pretty damn happy about it.

I was driving behind someone on a moped the other day going 20 mph on the 35mph road… and I was actually saying to myself how SLOW this person was… but not in a complaining type of way, just an observation.

Then it occurred to me what others must felt behind me when I drove mine for the first time… I was going 5mph for 11 miles… lol TRUST ME, people were NOT happy, and it was during rush hour too.

Made me realize what my mom told me as a child that stuck with me… She says “people are able to see the mud on other people’s back, but never their own”

Those who are smart enough to get multiple mirrors so they can see the mud on their own backs, will prosper in life.

The past few months I’ve been realizing about all the mud on my back that I’ve never noticed… and I just wanted to crawl under a rock and hide from the world out of embarrassment! lol

But I realize, you can never grow without sunlight… and I need to accept that’s not who I am NOW… that bitch was WHACK! lol SOOOOOOooOoOooOoo embarrassing!

Crazy is one thing… but THAT? That was just UGH!!! lol I can’t deal!

lol, Okay I got to get back on it… I have a lot on my plate… lucky for me, I’m hungry.



Could anyone think we’re not all related somehow? Like, how are people still THAT stupid?

My 10 year old son and I are very close… well, I’m close with all my kids. But today we were talking about his Roblox character and he says “you don’t look like a real Asian”… which of course I get what he means, by what is represented in media.

I asked him to describe what does an Asian look like to him… and he said the stereotype of slanted eyes… which I asked him if he considered Indians to be Asian?

He says of course. And it clicked to him that half of the Asian population are dark skinned people with huge eyes. Then he acknowledged that I do look like a real Asian, just not the Asian they talk about.

They don’t talk about the people in the southeast Asian region. There’s a lot of mix people there. Indian, African, Chinese and even French heritage. You can’t expect us to have a certain type of look.

We’re all related. We have connections to each other. That’s why racism is just so weird to me… like with today’s access to information, how the fuck are you still stupid? 🤷🏾‍♀️

This is my Khmer appreciation post. I love my people and my culture. After all we’ve been through, we still manage to find happiness.

It’s a choice. Like love.

Aloha aloha ALOHA

With love and only love,


Love on the brain

I haven’t worn a bra since my teens. I didn’t need support everyday, just on my period days… so there was no point, lol actually there were 2 points 😂

I’m glad I didn’t listen to everyone else.

I’ve only completed 8th grade.

My 10 year old has better grammar than I do. He’s been homeschool at least half the year for every year. This year it’s entirely homeschool.

I realize what takes the school to teach my son in a year, I can teach him in 2 weeks. Like a crash course.

Example is his reading. Entering 3rd grade we were told he’s behind by a year on reading. Now he’s reading, comprehending and his grammar is of a freshman in high school.

Lol it’s funny he says he thought someone was younger than him on Roblox because they had bad grammar. The kid was 14.

He now knows how to code games also. And is living a happy stress free life.

YOU are the most important person in your child’s life. It is YOUR responsibility to raise your child. Not the school.

But it takes a village to raise a child. Let alone children. I am blessed to have my mom. And some amazing nannies who are still a part of my kids life.

School need to change ASAP.

My 10 year old don’t need to learn history that constantly changes as we figure new information out. Shit I was told Columbus discovered America and Pluto was a planet.

Our schools need to focus on the important things that make the world a better place.

I want schools to teach compassion, understanding, empathy, teach kindness and patience.

I believe children have a natural love. And because of forced behavior (to sit still in a room at 6am?? Wtf is That??), we are asking them to fight amongst each other to be teachers pet.

Or who gets that scholarship. Or who gets that job? Really? Wtf? Why are we wanting this for our future??

To teach them to tear each other down for something that should be more than abundant? Really?

Competition is great. But without the right guidance, it can turn into bullying, or even worse. There’s a whole spectrum of possibilities. Because we don’t equip our kids with proper adults to guide. They don’t teach the emotional/spiritual side of growing up. And raising children, it’s more important than just remember shit to pass a test.

These “teachers” don’t exist as much anymore. The ones who do it for the love… still. There are some. But even they don’t have the right tools. They’ve been begging for it. And we just need to continue to use our public funding to fund private prisons and wars.

Because supposedly that’s doing the public a favor right? Isn’t that evil?

Playing god

We need to stop worshipping the devil.

It is time to turn back to God. To nature.

God would not support what is being done right now. And oddly, no one is talking about it still.

God has left. It’s not Democrat or Republican. That’s just a game they use to turn us against each other.

Love is love. It has no sides.

The idea that one man is valued more at birth is absurd. And that is what they continue to teach us by putting us in the system.

The loop.

We are born.

We enter the loop at 5.

We obey/disobey

We are rewarded/ punished

We die.

They want us to focus on kneeling, what celebrities are doing, Donald trump… while they kill innocent children because they are different and lock our brothers, fathers and sons up.

It’s about the evil that exist in this world. And our contribution to it by being silent. Our contribution by putting our children through it. To be one day ready to die for something that wasn’t even worth living for in the first place.

What do you live for?

Why bother living if there’s nothing worth dying for? Your life would be meaningless.

Life isn’t really worth living if truth can’t be free.

Die for truth. It sucks.

The greatest do.


They all did 😳

The evil is within

God need to make a comeback… soon.


Real love

Couldn’t ask for a better sissy…

My tubes are tied…

I realize most of the people who call successful people lucky use their free time to play games, drink uselessly or aimlessly spend time on social media.

I am not a princess.

Early on in our relationship, my ex husband asked if I wanted to be treated like a princess or a queen? And I looked at him and said “the fucking King” 🤷🏾‍♀️

Gained 8 lbs

8 more to go…

And a whole lot of love…

And only love,


Be Humble

Be stubborn. Be humbly stubborn.

If it makes you happy, and no one is harmed, be stubborn as Fuck. Magic is real. It is… and science proves it exist.

Not only that, just look at nature!


Jelly fish that can be immortal? Hello? Animals living for hundreds of years? Everything on this rock obtaining energy from our super star, the sun?? That’s all magic. Don’t let people who don’t know shit tell you it’s not real.

If you do a quick study of human history, THEY Have been telling us, forcing us, to believe in the WRONG things.

Science have proven so many stupid shit that stupid people use to believe… Now science can be use to prove God exist. The bullshit religious leaders tells us that God is some man in the sky granting wishes to those who believe in him… that’s simply not true, it kind of is… lol but it’s more deep than that, but yet so simple.

It’s an energy source. They apply the pronouns “he” and “him” so people back then can understand it more and therefore relate to it. Then they force you to believe their ways or else…

Or else what? NUFFIN. NOT A DAMN THING. All they do is lie to us to control us.

You don’t need to go to church to believe in God. You don’t need to belong to any religious groups to believe in God. Jesus is real. Allah is real. There’s a bunch of real people with some real knowledge trying to spread it… but assholes end up misinterpreting it for their own sinister benefits.

I don’t have all the answers to everything… and I won’t claim that I do. But I do know that I’m finding more and more proof that God exist just by digging more into the science of energy.

How could all these people say God don’t exist, but have zero idea on what God truly is? If you don’t know what it is, how could you be so sure?

God came before religions. God came before the churches. The bibles. Before the men in their silly costumes… God has always been and always will be.

I believe the next big thing in human discovery will be the power in us. Not just some self belief that everything will be great… but the belief that you are divine.

Be humbly divine.

Don’t discount me just because I’m crazy. Discount me if I’m wrong… but I’m not.

With love and only love and a little weed lol




I’m the type of woman to round up my age, my weight… And my future.

Was told by my cuddle buddy that I’m weird because I actually believe in myself.

I honestly do. And I encourage everyone around me to do the same. Why not?

You can be your own super hero…

Everything happens for you… I swear they do. Legit. EVERYTHING. The sun shines everyday for you… if you weren’t here, it wouldn’t exist. Your life matters, magic is real, combine the two with love and only love.



I don’t attend church… in fact, I’m anti church. God came way before the church ever did… and I doubt Jesus and his peeps attended church. They attend group gatherings and learn about the new ways and teachings… but they didn’t worship some dude in a funny costume and hat, while he & his friends steals your money and rape your kids… Fuck the church. FUCK THEM. God is real without the Church.

God is LOVING energy… and loving energy doesn’t fucking rape children. FUCK THE GOD DAMN CHURCH. Aloha

I say this with Love and only love,



It’s a strange thing to fall out of love… sure you’ll fall in love again, but the journey there will never be the same… and the results could be even more spectacular.


Signed by my momma. Aloha

Booed up

I started this new venture to show that it could be done easily… and it’s actually doing a lot better than I expect… so I’m focusing all my attention on this new project, and putting my H&H on hold until the next year.

It’s great to see your ideas come to life… but one of the most amazing feelings in the world is to see a lot of people loving it.

Creative energy… it’s an awesome gift. Don’t lose it.

The trick is to NEVER grow up… lol you honestly don’t need to.

I threw a bunch of spaghetti on the wall and this one stuck very well. I can’t wait to play.



What does normal feel like?

I’ve fallen, and I’m going to make the most of it while I’m down here.